Hidden Valley is seemingly boundless in it's array of dumb-ass promotions. This time targeting the ever important 18-25 male demographic, those who have yet to grow into the more refined "Ranch Fountain".
For full disclosure, I have performed 2 keg stands in my life, and I surely have several bro-bo-pals out there that still get wild with their wings... However, they know best not to arrive at this studio with those, or any other tortured, dip-able items. Conclusion: The keg is kicked.
...and still I couldn't bring my cheap ass to buy it! I can't remember (because it's like 20 years), but salad maybe the only okay thing this place does, however... The thought of seeing that logo staring back at me every time I open the refrigerator was a non-starter. Regardless of price. I'm not there, and I'm not your fucking family. .merda.
Well, from the looks of this new online shoppe, it appears that the valley has been discovered...
That's right folks, from t-shirts to bejeweled bottles, this Hidden Valley storefront has all your ranch related needs (ahem... wants) covered. Don't forget to pick up a RANCH FOUNTAIN for your next terribly disgusting dinner party!
Right. I'm not a ranch hater or lover. I appreciate the love and dedication that whoevers the fuck put into this.
Then!!, from this article on Delish, I learned that March 10th is "National Ranch Day", so now I'm pissed and retract anything nice I might have said about ranch.
If any dressing deserves a holiday, it's definitely NOT ranch... maybe Franch tho? (celebrated as Thousand Island Day in Canada)??